Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Leap Day

Ever have one of those months where you feel like you are experiencing extreme parental failure at every turn?  February has been that way for me. I do account for the fact that it’s the end of the winter and we’ve been sick around here pretty much the entire month. And then throw in the few personal trials that have occurred and affected our routine and my ability to “cope” and February is one for the tanker. I don’t like to wish life away because “The days are long and the years are short” but I am glad that this month is over.

I love the days where you wake up with your big girl panties already on and are ready to go the moment your feet hit the floor! I’m sad to report that the majority of this month I have had to put those big girl panties on and then stretch them up to my chin. Not to mention the fact that I’ve had to keep pulling them up all day long because they keep slipping. Maybe I’ve lost some weight or something and just need a smaller size.....

It’s been such a struggle for me to get out of the bed every morning lately. I have to make myself do it. I am ashamed to say that Olivia has played in her bed for longer than I like to admit most mornings and James and Audrey have jumped on me, shaking the living day lights out of me, more times than I’d like to remember begging for cereal because they are "starving and if I don’t get them any cereal they are gonna be so starving.” Disclaimer: I’m not talking 8:00 or later lazy, I’m talking 7:15-7:30 lazy. 

There have been so many scraps and arguments and ridiculous shrieking and hitting and pinching and far to many unnecessary tears shed. All between James and Audrey I might add, well just the hitting and pinching parts anyway. Ha! So much of the time I don’t know if what I did and said was the right thing to try and remedy the situation. I hate questioning my parenting techniques. Now, I am by no means saying that I have months upon months where I never doubt or regret what I’ve done or said because I am far from perfect. But I do have moments where I know what I’ve done was the right thing. And I know the words that I spoke were the right ones. Even if my measures were harsh, they were what was needed to be done or said at that moment. I wush my life, my parenting skills were like that all the time. I wush (as my Audrey says) that I had a play by play, step by step manual for these kiddos I call mine. But I guess we wouldn’t need faith if we had that, would we?

Housekeeping comes in at whole nutha level. I must say though that I have grown in this area. I don’t like to be lazy or too busy and fall behind in the housekeeping but there has been a little inner peace that’s been instilled inside me when the house isn’t in tip top shape at the end of the night. Used to I would feel so guilty seeing one room or lots of rooms in shambles when I made my way to the bed for the night. I don’t feel guilty any more I just feel disgusted that I have more work ahead of me tomorrow. Ha! I have found that if I wash 1-2 loads of clothes a day or sometimes every other day and fold and put them away then the laundry doesn’t pile up and I don’t have to waste an entire day catching up on that. I used to have one laundry day and I would spend the whole day folding and putting them away. I’ll never go back to that. It’s so easy to fold and put up 1-2 baskets full verses 6-7. I would always get burnt out and then there would be piles laying around for days and ones that needed to be ironed hanging on chairs for days and mismatched socks laying around. And there’s nothing that I hate more than socks that don’t have a match.

No no, Livi

That being said I have fallen grossly behind in the day to day chores this month. I have got to step it up next month. I have a crawler on my hands and even though I keep her corralled for the most part and don’t let her roam free unless I am right behind her watching her every move or my 2 big helpers to make sure she doesn’t put anything in her mouth or pull something on her head, I have got to step it up people!!! It’s all about perspective so much of the time and I am determined that March is going to be a fantabulous month around here!!

p.s. y’all don’t know how glad I am that I don’t live a reality t.v. life and there are no camera’s following me around for every one to see how many times I “drop the ball!” Just saying.


the ladner family said...

Don't beat yourself up !!! I am glad u finally have peace about leaving the house dirty . Tomorrow is another day. We all have slumps like that. Those pics are so cute !

Emily said...

Go eat a cookie. Or maybe a cake. It'll help those big girl panties stay up. hahaha

It sounds like your February has been what my December was. Those months are' sho! But thank the Lord that they do pass!

Kuddos for writing about it. It helps all us mamas feel more normal!

Love ya! And LOVE the new pics. Adorable babies!

Becky said...

Oh how I love the way you illustrate your words AND pictures!

His Mercy Endureth Forever said...

I was thinking as I was reading this, that you must have been talking about ME! Every single thing you described is exactly what I have felt like myself. Maybe we should form a support group! HA! My prayer is that the Lord will give us Mom's wisdom and patience. I'll be praying that March is better for you!