A few weeks ago I had an experience that changed my life. OK, not literally, but it sure made me start thinking. Keep up if you can.
Audrey takes ballet on Thursdays and before they split the class one of the little girls she danced with was the daughter of a teacher that teaches with Jon. Well, this particular Thursday that I am speaking of had been a heck of a one. And I mean that, literally. I didn’t feel to great and Olivia had her 4 month well check that afternoon at 1:30 in Tallahassee, which is at least a 45 min drive from our little town. Audrey’s dance is at 3. I tried to change the appointment but if I wanted to see my favorite ped, I’d have to keep it or wait 2 months. So I kept it. Unwise decision #1.
We were having company coming in that night for a big church meeting weekend so I started early. Not really. I waisted too much time surfing the Internet which was the unwise decision #2 of the day and then scrambled around trying to do school and clean and feed a baby and pack clothes and dance shoes and blah blah blah, you get the idea. I magically made it in the car with every thing we would need and made it to the pediatricians office on time. On time to sit and wait for almost an entire hour.
Once we got back to see the doctor, I told Audrey I didn’t think we would make it back in time for her ballet. That was unwise decision #3. I should not of told her then. She broke down into sobs and they weren’t angry sobs they were heartbroken ones, ones I just can’t take. So, told her we would try. And I did which was unwise decision #4. On the way there, they both fell asleep. Not good. When we hit Cairo city limits, I woke Audrey up by throwing her ballet shoes at her (nice, eh?) and telling her to put them on, we were almost there and had 20 minutes left in the class. I should of just let it go but stubborn me pressed on. I mean, I have paid for these classes already. She was crying because she was in that “I’ve just woken up from a nap that didn’t last long enough” and then she started crying harder when I told her we’d just keep on going and go home if she didn’t stop it. I pulled up at the door and told her to get out. She lost it, said she couldn’t go in by herself. Well, there was no where for me to park by the door so I had to drive around to find a space. I was so frustrated because it was just precious minutes she was eating up by acting like this. Which of course hinds sight is 20/20 and if I had just let it go I wouldn’t of ended up being so put out with both of my kids and they wouldn’t of ended up getting in lots of trouble by the time we finally made it home to a house full of company. It wasn’t their fault, it was all mine. Lesson learned, let me tell you!
Once we finally got inside there was about 15 minutes left in her class and I rushed her inside the studio but she wouldn’t let go of me. I guess I traumatized her or something by wanting her to go in by herself. Her teacher finally got her to come on in. I was frazzled by this point and I sat down in a big huff, wiping sweat of my face. Olivia started fussing so I had to go back out to the car for her bottle because I left the diaper bag in the van. Sheesh. Once I got back inside and sat down, some of the students and parents from the next class started trickling in. In walks our teacher friend that I spoke of at the beginning of this parable. We will call Ms. Organized. Here I am panting, wiping sweat off my face, feeding a baby, trying to balance a 4 year old boy on my lap (who is very emotional from his short nap) and I look over and see her. We speak and smile at each other but on the inside I was snarling at her. I mean, I’m surprised she didn’t ask me what was wrong because I couldn’t take my eyes off her. It was like I was in a trance. Why, you ask? Well, Ms. Organized came in calm and dry with 3 bags neatly zipped. She calmly told her little girl to put her ballet shoes on and she did it. Ms. Organized was so neat and proper and cool and calm I could of hit her. Literally.
Here Ms. Organized is a middle school teacher, United Way organizer, Teacher of the Year for the county, jazz instructor and her list goes on and on. Yes, she only has one child but it’s not like the girl doesn’t have any thing else to do. How does she do it?? I want her secret! I want to be like that!! As I was relaying my story to Jon he was laughing and snarling with me! He said she’s so neat and organized and never in a flurry at school too. He asked her one day how in the world she does all that she does and her answer was fairly simple. She gets up at 4:30 every morning and usually doesn’t stop until 9:00 every night. Well.....maybe I don’t want organization and calmness that badly!
But seeing her the other day in my state of confrusion and what not, really did make me start thinking. I have to start making better decisions with my time and stick to at least one of my many schedules that I have made in the last few months. And I totally threw the baby out with the bath water on that hectic Thursday and will remember it for years to come and hopefully be very careful not to do it again.
Stay at home moms have so many distractions in this day and age. Blogs to read, facebook to keep up with, pinterest to look at, grocery deals to look at, emails to check blah blah blah the list goes on and on. This problem I have with distraction has been on my mind a lot lately and I have been trying to remedy it halfheartedly and this passage of scripture has been on mind. When Jesus’ parents were looking for him and he told them “I must be about my Father’s business” He did not get distracted. I feel like all these distractions are looking for me every hour and I am constantly answering them, there for many of my tasks fall by the way side and I am constantly playing catch up or scrambling around out of breath or getting frustrated with my chirren. I know that my Father’s business for me is reading and studying His word and being not only a hearer but a doer. *But whoso looketh into the perfect law of liberty, and continueth therein, he being not a forgetful hearer, but a doer of the work, this man shall be blessed in his deed. So I must *Rise while it is yet night.......Open my mouth with wisdom and kindness.......and look well to the ways of MY household and eat not the bread of idleness.”
Look for me to blog on Wednesday’s and if I have blessed any one today with the baring of my soul, please, go out and be doers of the word.